A New Chapter

Today I am standing at the feet of a new beginning. A new chapter in my life. Today also marks 21 months alcohol free for me!! I am super proud of myself for that.

I find myself single again, but I know in my heart that I did everything I could to make it work. The timing just wasn’t right. Unfortunately it took us five months to figure that out, or at least to accept it anyway.

I’ve learned a lot about myself and I’ve grown a lot over the last 5 months. I think I might be healthier than I gave myself credit for. I feel sadness in my heart, I’m hurting, but what’s more than that is that I just want her to be happy. I want us both to just be happy.

Back to my next chapter in life, What does that look like? What do I want it to look like?

I want to spend more time with family and friends.

The weather is getting nice again here in Minnesota, so I’d like to get back into hiking.

Things seem to be opening more, I’m hoping that means there will be more available in person yoga classes I can attend. I’ve neglected my yoga practice for far too long. I know there are outdoor yoga classes too, I should look into those.

I’ve already begun to bring meditation back into my life with joining a 6 week meditation class. I think this is going to be a huge positive shift for me. I’m really looking forward to it.

I need to start taking steps toward finishing my degree. So, I think what I am going to do is to just start taking one class at a time, just so I can keep moving forward with it. My passion has always been with helping people. My dream career is to be a therapist. It’s never going to happen if I don’t start making some forward progress here.

I’ve come to the realization that I am starting to love myself. It seems the healthier I become, the more love and respect I have for myself. I’m going to keep working on loving and respecting myself. This will also help me to create healthy boundaries for myself, others in my life, and the future people that come into my life.

I’m also going to start working more on my gifts. I have a very intuitive way about me that I would like to strengthen. I’m also an empath, I would like to strengthen that gift as well and learn how to set healthy safe boundaries around that gift.

I’ve been saying for years that I need to eat a healthier diet. While I have lost a fair amount of weight over the past month, it has been a stress diet, not a healthy diet. So, my plan is to start feeding my body better.

I’m not going to just start feeding my body better food, but I need to start feeding my mind, body and soul better. More self-care and self-love behaviors and activities.

This chapter of my life is all about me finding my center balance again and self-care. The more me I become the better I feel about myself. I will use this time to continue working on becoming the best version of me that I can be.

I have faith in the Universe that it will bring me my person. That person will be the right person at the right time and we will compliment each other in life. Together we will build a solid foundation to build a happy, healthy, respectful, loving relationship. Until then, I will work on further healing myself, self-care, and continue working on my life goals.

Here’s to my next chapter.

With love and light,


The Present Moment is Like This Now

This evening I began a 6 week journey of Mindful Meditation. I had completely forgotten that I had signed up for this online zoom 6 week beginner mindful meditation class, a week or two ago. It wasn’t until yesterday when I got an email reminder that I remembered. I guess one could say I wasn’t mindful of it 😉

I am really excited about this journey. I started meditating about 5-6 years ago. I thoroughly enjoyed it back then, but somewhere along the way I stopped practicing. I haven’t practiced routinely for probably the last 4 years.

It is so easy to let our thoughts get the best of us and take us away from the present moment, from actually living. It happens to all of us. Very seldom are we ever in and aware of the present moment. It’s like when you’re driving to or from work. Your mind is filled with thoughts of work or what needs to be done at home or a thousand other thoughts, before you know it you’ve arrived at work or home, but really have no recollection of the drive at all. You know you did it, but you weren’t mindfully aware of doing it while you were doing it. This is just one example of how our thoughts distract us from living in the present moment.

Not that having thoughts is a bad thing, but sometimes we just want/need to be in the moment. We don’t always want our thoughts to control us or our time.

One of my takeaways from tonight’s class was to periodically throughout the day bring an awareness to the present moment, say to yourself, “the present moment is like this now.” During this moment, try to allow yourself to really have an awareness of the present moment. What sensations are you feeling, what do you hear, what do you smell, what do you see? It doesn’t have to be a long moment, just a few seconds of awareness in the present moment.

During the class tonight we did two meditation sets. The first was a whole body sensation meditation, where you are mindfully aware of the sensations in your whole body. The second meditation was about relaxation and awareness. It was about just that, relaxing and being aware of the present moment. If we got lost in thought, once we became aware of it, we brought ourselves back to a prominent sensation in our body to get us back on track.

The goal isn’t necessarily to stop thoughts, but rather to have a better awareness of what our thoughts are, the stories we tell ourselves, and how to control them so that we can be more present in the moment and in our lives.

Who doesn’t want to live in the moments of our lives?

Week 1/Class 1 was a great start to this 6 week journey. For the next 6 weeks I will be participating in class every Tuesday night and meditating for 15-30 minutes every day. I am so looking forward to the growth and awareness I will gain over the next 6 weeks.

Stay tuned for updates!